Half a Century!

So, this year I turn 50. I can barely believe it, how did that happen?
I am feeling old.

When I turned 20 I felt grown up. I actually got married just before I was 21. Looking back now that seems really young, but I didn’t feel young, I felt like an adult and I felt that I’d met my life partner. I wasn’t even pregnant!

When I turned 30 my husband had decided that he didn’t want to be with me any more.  I became an Independent Woman (throw your hands up at me!) with my two kids and my full time job. I didn’t really mind being single, life was good.

Turning 40 was life changing again. I’d met my current partner in my late 30s and we had decided to have a baby together. I’d hoped it would happen before I turned 40 and I just about made it. My daughter was born three months before my 40th birthday. I went on to have two more babies in my forties, so for me, my forties were the new thirties! All the time I’ve been forty I haven’t felt old. I don’t know whether that is having a younger partner or three small children that has made me feel younger, but my age really hasn’t bothered me at all.

Approaching 50 didn’t really bother me either, until a night out in February. Some bloke was asking my friend if she liked his shoes but she was brushing him off. He was a bit worse for wear. His friend, who was not so drunk asked me what I thought and I politely told him they were ok. The drunk guy turned around and said “If I wanted the opinion of fifty something woman I’d have asked!”

That one comment from a drunken guy totally deflated me. I know it shouldn’t have but it did.

I was going to be a fifty something woman, I was going to be old. Half a Century old! My opinion didn’t count because I was an old lady. It just went round and round in my head.

The guy wasn’t even that young, probably his early 30s….I was still old enough to be his mum!

This getting old lark is not easy.

So I googled the best things about turning 50 and most of them don’t apply to me…like the kids being grown-up, having more freedom, having the house to myself etc.
Some of them I really don’t like, who wants to be happy because it’s ok to forget things, or do daft things, or give lame excuses about your age for things you don’t want to do?
Ah, and apparently you don’t have to care about your appearance any more, no more nips and tucks or botox once you reach 50…I think I’ve missed something somewhere?

So 50 really is old.

It’s all downhill from here.

*Insert suitable swearword*

I’m going to write my bucket list of things to do before I’m 60! It’s only 10 years away and the Little Man will be doing his GCSEs by then!

P.S, would you have a party for your 50th? My family are trying to convince me but I’m really not sure I want to celebrate. Not only that but my family couldn’t organize a p*ss up in a brewery let alone a party so I don’t really want to be doing all that work…not at my age anyway!

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45 Comments

  1. August 31, 2015 / 1:19 pm

    I am only 35 and I admit I do think about turning 50 which really is not that far off. When I am 50 my son will be 20 and my daughter 18 yikes

    • August 31, 2015 / 6:56 pm

      At least I'm not really old enough to be your mum 🙂

  2. August 31, 2015 / 2:59 pm

    50 seems like so far away right now but I know it's not and it will be here in no time at all. My children will be 25 and 23 when I'm 50 x x

    • August 31, 2015 / 6:57 pm

      Mine will be 27, 26, 10, 8 and 5 yrs old. My eldest already has grey hairs! (my 26 yr old is named Cassie)

  3. August 31, 2015 / 3:12 pm

    It is scary how the years fly buy I feel like I should still be late teens, but I'm about to hit 30! Where did my 20s go :/

    • August 31, 2015 / 6:58 pm

      It's really kind of weird, most of the time I feel like I'm about 30, then I look in the mirror and think 'What!!!!'

  4. August 31, 2015 / 3:39 pm

    I am nearly 50 as is the husbeast and we have young children. You know what I have started to not give a damn about what other people think. I am going to be a cantankerous old B£$%$

  5. August 31, 2015 / 4:19 pm

    50 most definitely is not old and I think you should celebrate it with a massive party x

    • August 31, 2015 / 6:59 pm

      Thank you, maybe someone will through me a surprise one, but I won't be holding my breath..not at my age anyway 😉

  6. August 31, 2015 / 4:59 pm

    Paaaarty! Yes, you must have one. I've been to a few 50th parties this year (I'll be 50 next year) and they've been great fun. I organised one for my husband and he loved it.
    I'm so cross about what that drunk guy said to you – he sounds like an idiot. Please forget what he said.

    • August 31, 2015 / 7:00 pm

      yes, he was an idiot, but they say the truth hurts and he was pretty close to it. I take comfort in the fact that most people look genuinely shocked when I tell them how old I am x

  7. August 31, 2015 / 6:50 pm

    You MUST have a party!! I turned 40 last year and wish I had celebrated. 50 isn't old these days and you are only as young as you feel 😉

    • August 31, 2015 / 7:01 pm

      I didn't do anything when I was 40, I was bit worn out having a newborn to look after. I like to say you're only as young as the man you feel and mine is 11 years younger than me 😉

  8. August 31, 2015 / 8:19 pm

    I am hoping that as I get older I start to feel younger. I am 24 with three small children so feel unbelievably old before my years but I am hoping that once they fly the nest I will have the time to invest in myself and make a start on my life bucket list!

    • September 1, 2015 / 9:44 pm

      No Carly, that's not feeling old, that's feeling mature, it's a good thing, embrace it xx

  9. August 31, 2015 / 9:26 pm

    They say life doesn't start until you're 50 (I think!). So have a party and tick some things of the bucket list. You're never too old!

    • September 1, 2015 / 9:45 pm

      I believe the saying is 40…but I don't mind changing it a little 😉

  10. August 31, 2015 / 10:48 pm

    It's mad to think my eldest will be 34 when I am 50 and my youngest wil be 30, it's crazy how quickly time flies, It doesn't feel that long ago I was at school myself and now my son will be going into year 3! x

    • September 1, 2015 / 9:46 pm

      Hannah, it's a strange feeling, but it doesn't feel that long ago when I was at school! x

  11. September 1, 2015 / 8:03 am

    You should def have a party. 50 is not old. Time seems to fly by the older you get doesn't it

    • September 1, 2015 / 9:46 pm

      It's sadly true, time does seem to go quicker as you get older, or maybe you just get used to the routine.

  12. September 1, 2015 / 8:34 am

    I am not far off 40 and absolutely dreading it I have to say!

    • September 1, 2015 / 9:47 pm

      No, don't dread 40, it's a brilliant decade. I'm sad to be leaving it behind.

  13. September 1, 2015 / 9:58 am

    50 is not old! I'm hitting 40 this coming year and age is most definitely about how you feel. Don't let some drunken idiot upset you. I'd have given him a piece of my mind – the opinion of a 50 year old woman is worth 50 times more than one of a drunken boy!

    • September 1, 2015 / 9:49 pm

      Thank you, you are right. I won't let anyone upset me like that again.

  14. September 1, 2015 / 6:51 pm

    My mom died when she was 48 and so I will definitely celebrate 50. 50 is young – no age at all. And as you said that guy was DRUNK. Ignore him. You are not old at all.

    • September 1, 2015 / 9:52 pm

      Oh Joy, that is such a young age 🙁 My Dad passed in his early 50s and I worried when my older brother reached that age, but he's still going strong into his mid 60s now. I will not speak to any more drunk men for sure!

  15. September 4, 2015 / 12:32 am

    I'm really sorry you had that experience with the drunk guy (who clearly knows NOTHING because, if we're really going to do comparisons, the opinion that comes from experience counts for more). Perhaps throwing a party is a good thing? Something to help you reframe turning 50, which should really be cause to celebrate.

  16. September 6, 2015 / 11:53 am

    I'm not sure I'd have a party, but my husband is a bit one for celebrating! I think you should go for it!

  17. September 6, 2015 / 2:22 pm

    Time just seems to fly, it's quite scary when you think about it. Definitely have a party! xx

  18. September 9, 2015 / 11:14 pm

    Time seems to go so quickly, it feels like only yesterday I was leaving school and I'm now 30! How horrible of the man to say such a thing, words certainly do hurt but I'm sure you look fabulous! xx

  19. September 14, 2016 / 1:35 pm

    Did you get your party, for your 50th? I turned 50 last year too and had a big party. I don't like all the things happening in the mirror, but I'm embracing it since I can't go backward. But I don't have young kids like you, I'd be exhausted.

    Cheers to us 1965 babies 😊

  20. September 14, 2016 / 2:22 pm

    Ah, you know what is great about 50? You lose your filter and you're less tolerant. It feels so liberating, lol. I can say what I think and not worry as much about others' feelings. Time to take care of you! I cried profusely when I turned 30. 40 didn't even faze me and 50 (last December) was a bit though until I decided to make it a great day – for myself, by myself. Husband did get a surprise dinner with family at the restaurant, even though I wish he didn't (don't tell him, ha). So, go out all the way, plan something you want to do even if it means taking time away from everybody else. Chin up, at least you're not as old as you'll be next year 🙂

  21. September 14, 2016 / 2:25 pm

    As I reached each milestone birthday it didn't bother me, although when I was in my fifties it did occur to me I only had maybe 20 more years to live. But then I decided I wouldn't worry about it. Embrace each day and the you know what to people who make rude remarks like the guy did. Either he will reach the age of 50 and realized what an idiot he was or the alternative.

  22. September 14, 2016 / 4:23 pm

    Life is very short the older I get, but keeping busy seems to be the key with things you love to do. Great post
    Maria

  23. September 14, 2016 / 9:39 pm

    50 is easy! Yep, make that bucket list because the next 10 years will fly by! 🙂

    gail

  24. September 14, 2016 / 11:09 pm

    Tacky of the drunk guy…he needed a swift kick in the pants if you ask me. So now, back to you…YES have the party! When I turned 60, I asked my hubby to give me a birthday party, and I'm still waiting 4 years later…LOL. Not his thing to throw parties apparently. And 50 is NOT old! Cute post Ann, & nice to meet you!
    Florence (another Blogging Fifty Girl)

  25. September 15, 2016 / 10:08 am

    Great post! Thank you for sharing as part of the link up this week!

  26. September 15, 2016 / 11:06 pm

    Love it! Well, no party for me. Unless you want to call it a pity party. I didn't want a big party. I celebrated quietly with my family.

  27. September 17, 2016 / 12:08 am

    I have to laugh because I graduated from high school in 1965! Do your math and yes, I'm that old. But I keep extremely busy and try to remember that age is just a number.

  28. September 17, 2016 / 11:15 am

    Hi, I just discovered this post via Create and Babble and can totally relate. I turned 50 last year – I'm a 1965er. I had mixed feelings about it too because I had my last child at 40 and most of my friends are a good decade younger than me. And like you said other 50 plus mums are living a totally different life to me with kids off their hands. I decided against a party and just celebrated with friends. I actually found the whole experience a bit depressing. One year later and I'm in a much better place about being a woman in my 50's. Feeling much more positive about the future and it all it has to offer. I wrote a post about turning 50 last year as well if you're interested in having a read. So happy to have found your blog.

  29. September 18, 2016 / 5:55 pm

    50 is not old! It's a state of mind only. I have so much admiration for you — your strength is an asset you should be so proud of! I'm turning 60 in a few months and I'm just beginning to think about a bucket list — so you have time. Let's all make the most of every minute.

  30. September 23, 2016 / 10:43 pm

    Fifty is not young at all. I am 55 and I feel younger than I have in years. Just you wait, the kids will keep you very young. That is how I feel, I've still got two teens at home and I listen to their music all day… and like it.

  31. September 25, 2016 / 1:20 am

    You are hilarious and that comment was just rude from the snarky guy with the shoes, good thing he got blown off… most Women of any age do recognize a jerk when they meet one. When he's 50 he'll just be an Old Jerk with no confidence in his own fashion sense, if that's any comfort to you? *winks* I'm raising a couple of my Grandkids and agree that still raising youngsters well into our Senior Years does sometimes have those unexpected advantages. I have more in common in my Home Life with the 20-30 something set than I do with the average Senior for example. *LOL* I'm much more relaxed about not sweating the small stuff Parenting involves since at a certain Season of Life if you're still Parenting youngsters, you really slack off a bit about stuff that doesn't really matter. *winks* There are actual benefits of the privilege of growing Old since it's not afforded to many and therefore I thoroughly Cherish it… I feel much more Liberated in so many ways, I don't give a _____ about what anyone says, thinks or becomes critical about in the way I choose to live my life… I just do my own thing with the utter confidence that it's my thing and my life, so if someone doesn't like it, step off. I do hope your 50+ years unfold in such a way that you enjoy them as much as you did every other Season… and look back at that one incident that stung and find it to just be hilarious! Blessings from the Arizona Desert… Dawn… The Bohemian

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