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Raisie Bay

blogtober 2020

Pictures of You (and Me)

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Today’s blogtober prompt, keeping to a musical theme is Picture of You. My immediate thoughts went to Boyzone, but then I remembered The Cure and Pictures of You. The song that will break the heart of anyone who has ever lost a loved one.

A Picture of Me

Over the past few years I’ve tried to be more in front of the camera than behind it. When you have a illness that no-one really knows much about you do start to think about your own mortality and photos are a great way of helping loved ones remember you. So, I’m going to spam you all now with pictures of me.

collage of photos for Blogtober a picture of you prompt. Top right, me and my friend, top middle, me and my husband, top right me and husband, bottom left me and husband at a family meal, bottom middle me and friend at my wedding, bottom left me, my brother and my youngest son.
Me and my friends and family taken during the last couple of years.
collage of four photos, top left a selfie of me in sunglasses, top right a selfie with me and Boo, bottom right, me and my son, bottom left me on the beach
A selfie, a selfie with my daughter, a photo with my son and me on the beach
collage of 3 photos of me and my family, me and my youngest son on a swing, me and Boo, me and my two girls when they were very young.
Me and the Little Man when I could walk, me and Boo, and me with my two little princesses

One More For the Road!

I love this caricature of me taken from a photo of me in my wheelchair by Charlene from Sooper Books. She took away the handbag from my lap and gave me a butterfly instead.

There was nothing in the world

That I ever wanted more

Than to feel you deep in my heart

There was nothing in the world

That I ever wanted more

Than to never feel the breaking apart

All my pictures of you

The Cure, Pictures of You

I hate being in photos, but they are such a great way of capturing the essence of a person and a lovely gift to hold on to when that person is no longer around. It really doesn’t matter how photogenic (or not) you are.

I hope that my photos have captured lots of lovely memories for my family.

#Blogtober20

Some posts related to photos above

The Red Shoes

Mad Blog Awards 2016

Our Holiday in Cornwall 2019

My Sunday Snapshot – Somebody I used to Know

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Today’s Blogtober prompt is Somebody I Used to Know. I’ve chosen an old scanned photo of two very dear people who are no longer in my life, and my Little nephew who was such a gorgeous baby.

old scanned photograph showing a man and woman with a baby in a buggy walking down a concrete ramp with a cliff wall to one side and metal railing to the other. They were heading down to the beach at Tenby.
Mum, Desmond and my nephew walking down the ramp to the beach at Tenby.

The photo was taken in Tenby in 1977. We went on holiday with my brother and his wife and their two children. Little baby nephew was the youngest.

Desmond

Desmond was a neighbour, he moved back in with his Mum two doors away from my Mum when he became divorced. Mum was already a widow and it wasn’t long before they fell in love

Desmond wasn’t in our life very long, he had a massive heart attack and died at home when I was just 13. While he was around he brought my Mum a lot of happiness and we enjoyed some lovely holidays too. Like this one in Tenby.

So Desmond is Somebody I used to know, but he’s more than that. He was someone who brought a lot of happiness into our lives. It was sad he couldn’t stayed around for longer.

Synchronicities

My Mum met Desmond when he was her neighbour, as I did Graham who had also moved back in with his Mum who lived two doors away from me. Mum had two young children at home, as did I when I met Graham. And Desmond was 10 years younger than Mum just like Graham is with me.

Seven years ago we moved to a new home. This was some 34 years after Des had passed away. Straight away I felt a sort of familiarity with the area, although I was certain I’d not been here before. The more I drove around the more familiar it beccame. Then one day I took a detour from a route home and ended up in a little grove. At the end of the grove was a house I recognised. It was Desmond’s ex wife’s house and where his children lived. He had three children one slightly older than me, one my age and one younger. I got on really well with them and even stayed at their home…the house I was now looking at, a few times. It was then I realised why I recognised the area so well.

While I stayed with them we’d taken the bikes out and I’d been riding along the streets I was now driving on. Then I realised that my children where now going to the same school that they had gone to, although the school name had been changed. (I may have realised sooner had I known this.)

Desmond had a huge influence on my life. He wasn’t my Dad but he came along at the right time and made life better for a while. He was much more than Somebody I used to Know.

I love the little ways that my life has kept a part of him alive. I would love to get in touch with his children again, but so far my searches haven’t revealed anything. I was even tempted to knock on the door of their old house, but 34 years is a long time.

#Blogtober20

My Sunday Photo and Ordinary Moments – Cushion

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I love to crochet, especially while listening to an audio book. This week I finished one of my Works In Progress, a cushion.

photo of a cushion in purple, pink and white pattern, lying on a brown settee.

I started it a while ago, the back is plain white and was very easy to make. The front consisted of three colours which were to be made in a complicated pattern. The pattern was not too bad to understand, but when you are changing four colours in each row it can be complicated and creates a lot of work on the back to sew in all the threads. I tried and gave up. I decided to use the same colours but make some squares and sew them together. I designed the pattern myself. I’m never 100% happy with what I make but I’m happy that I didn’t just give up on it. And now I have a super soft colourful cushion.

The Ordinary Moments, Some Might Say

Today’s Blogtober post is ‘Some Might Say’ and I have to say, I really don’t like Oasis. I never have, the Gallagher’s both annoy me beyond belief and I don’t like their voices. But I do like some of their songs and this is one of them. And the lyrics are quite relevant for these time don’t you think.

Some Might Say we will find a brighter day!

So many awful things that are going on in the world right now. There has to be a brighter day coming. At the moment, all I can see is division and suffering. But life goes on, and we have to think of our children. I don’t believe that there is a big plan to get us all under control. That is not possible, we have been free for too long. We can’t even follow simple instructions like not gathering in crowds and putting on masks. Its a crazy situation. Following the rules could get the pandemic under control, but if it you don’t believe there is a pandemic then you won’t follow the rules.

I can see us going around in circles for a long time over this and there will be a lot of lives lost or ruined.

Some might say that we will find a brighter day!

Let’s keep hoping they are right!

In the meantime, I’m going to keep home as much as I can and do my favourite things like read and crochet. I may even make another cushion!

image shows a drawing of a camera with flowers. A badge for My sunday Snapshot from Rachel Swirl blog.
The Ordinary Moments
#Blogtober20

All That She Wants is a Little Compassion.

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“Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive.” 
― Dalai Lama XIV, The Art of Happiness

I’ve mentioned it before but my Mum was very critical of me when I was growing up, she’d use phrases like ‘wet blanket’ and ‘so laid back, she’s horizontal.’ Yes, I know, she’d probably call me a ‘snowflake’ if she was still around.

But do you know what? I’m happy with the way I am. Yes, I may be over sensitive, I may think too much about stuff, I am a peace lover not a fighter. It’s taken me a long time to be comfortable with all that, but trying to change it has never worked.

Compassion

compassion/kəmˈpaʃ(ə)n noun

Sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others.

I think this world lacks a lot of compassion. I keep on getting drawn to threads on Social Media about the COVID pandemic and I know I shouldn’t. Sometimes I find it difficult to keep my mouth shout (or my typing fingers!) But, I don’t argue or lack compassion.

I got into a conversation with someone who stated that the virus was the work of nature, weeding out the elderly and sick to improve the human race. Like a Darwinian Survival of the Fittest. I should have avoided but I found his comments cruel. No-one deserves to die, particularly someone who has a young family and contracted a chronic illness which puts them at high risk. I told him his words were unkind and he just replied that he didn’t believe there was a pandemic anyway. Yes, I definitely should have avoided. I clicked his profile, he was a gay man. I remember back in the 80s when AIDs was rife and people would say it was nature’s way of weeding out gay people. I found that despicable too. I decided not to interact with this person anymore though. I guess some people just don’t think about their comments.

I hate that fellow humans cannot show simple compassion for each other.

All That She Wants is a Little Love in this World.

We CAN fight this pandemic together. We can work together and keep it under control while carrying on with our daily life. Yes, things will need to change for a while, less interaction, social distancing, mask wearing, no overcrowding. It’s hard, but it’s not as awful as losing a loved one, and it wouldn’t be forever. In fact it could all be over a lot quicker if people would show a little compassion for others.

There are two different kind of disaster movies, those were everyone does whatever they can to help their fellow humans, including self sacrifices. And those where everyone turns on each other and fights for their own needs with not concern for anyone else.

We are facing a global disaster, if it was a movie, I know which one I’d rather be acting in.

“For me, I am driven by two main philosophies: know more today about the world than I knew yesterday and lessen the suffering of others. You’d be surprised how far that gets you.” 
― Neil deGrasse Tyson

Compassion is Not So Hard To Feel

There is nothing wrong with caring about other people. Yes, you need to look after yourself too, but caring about others can make you feel even better.

We are all different, with different needs. I care that people can not go to work and see their friends and family. Despite the fact that I work from home and have all my close family around me at home.

I care that people are struggling to feed their families and losing their homes. I don’t want that to happen to anyone.

It even saddens me to see that those who have had fabulous weddings and holidays abroad this year cancelled. Despite the fact that I had no real plans apart from a couple of small British holidays (which were cancelled.)

My heart is broken for all those that missed hospital treatments and operations. For those that died of Cancer and other conditions that were diagnosed quickly enough.

Compassion means that I care about all these things and still believe that COVID is a big threat that should be taken seriously. I don’t think we’ve seen even half of the damage it is capable of yet. I don’t believe it’s less dangerous than flu and I think that people have become far too complacent.

So, why can’t people who are in these situations show a little compassion for those who have lost lives, who will lose lives and who have suffered greatly because of this virus. I keep getting quoted percentages which change from person to person, but percentages mean nothing to me. I care more about humanity and kindness. Plus, you can’t really evaluate percentages until the entire thing is over or under control. They mean nothing.

There is not point trying to make these people see my point of view. I don’t want to argue and fight. All that this woman wants is for us all to stand together and fight this pandemic into submission. And I believe it is possible. Plus a little compassion goes a long way.

Text on marbled background. This is my letter to the world, that never wrote to me. A quote by Emily Dickinson about compassion.

This is my post for Blogtober 2020 under the prompt ‘All That She Wants’ you can see my other blogtober posts here.

#Blogtober20

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

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Today’s blogtober prompt is Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. Every now and then I do posts about the funny things my girls have said or done. I do them because they are great reminders for me and they do feel pretty indulgent. But I love my blog space to be full of memories and the funnier the better.

Here are a couple of new ones (They seem to be getting less now that they are older) and some of my favourites.

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

I went into the girls bedroom and it was a mess. Star always dresses in the bathroom, but Boo gets dressed in the bedroom and always leaves her dirty clothes there. The room was full of dirty clothes so I came downstairs and told Boo to go up and bring all her clothes down and put them in the washing basket.

Boo, being Boo, took me completely literally and brought down ALL of her clothes for the washing basket. Yes, all the dirty ones from the floor and the clean ones from her cupboard!!

Some of My Favourite Funnies

Quite topical at the moment, this is the time Boo who was just in Reception class, had been learning about November 5th and Remembrance Day. This is what she told me:

“Guy Fawkes tried to deaded the king by blewing him up, but he blew himself up instead, now we have to wear a Poppet to remember him”

We still tease her about this.

There was another time when Boo asked if French Fries were Italian food! After explaining that French people lived in France not Italy I then had to explain that French Fries are American. Life can be confusing sometimes.

Christmas Song

We still tease poor Star about this even though she was four years old at the time. I was playing with her around Christmas time and she said she wanted to sing a Christmas song. So I asked her which song she wanted to sing thinking she might have come up with Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer or Jingle Bells. But she replied with ‘the one with the Turkey and Custard Cream.’ We never worked out what she meant but we have made our own song up about the Turkey and custard cream that we still sing to her every Christmas.

turkey and custard cream

Trickle Treating

Recently on This Morning (UK Television program) a Birmingham based presenter was doing an item on Trick and Treating for Halloween, but she kept on saying Trickle Treating. The rest of the presenters were laughing at her but she really believed that it was Trickle Treating. I thought it was so funny because Boo has always called it Trickle Treating too. We are also from Birmingham. It must be the Birmingham accent.

girls just wanna have fun, two little girls dressed up for trick and treating in witches outfits.
Two young witches

So Sweet

Finally, I’ll leave you with a little story about Boo when she was just 3 years old. I had bought the girls a packet of sweets each at the shops and when we got home Star couldn’t find her packet. I asked Boo if she’d seen Star’s sweets and she replied innocently;

‘yes Mummy, I’ve seen them and now they are in my tummy.

At least she was honest 🙂

Thanks for reading, pop on over to the link up and see what everyone else has been writing about today.

#Blogtober20