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Raisie Bay

Covid

It’s a Return to School, not the end of Lock Down!

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I’ve started this post many times and kept it in draft. But today, I just feel like having my say. The schools in the UK have opened their doors to their pupils this week, but some are taking it as the end of lock down.

Back to School

back to school after lock down

My Little Man returned to his primary school on Monday. He’s in year six, his last year of primary and the last few months are so important and special. He was thrilled to be going back and seeing his friends. He’s worked every day on Microsoft Teams, logging into his lessons and doing his work. But the past few weeks have been a struggle and he was so ready to get back to a more normal school environment.

Of course it’s not really normal, they still have no mixing of classes, teacher’s with clear face coverings, lunch in their classrooms, lots of outdoor work, one way systems around the school, segregated break times etc. The school is taking the threat seriously and teachers have not been vaccinated as a priority so I’m glad they are taking precautions. Mostly, the children are taking it all in their stride. They are just happy to be back and the school is doing their best to make it good for them as well as safe.

It’s a different story with the parents though. I don’t go to the school because of my vulnerability, (or underlying health conditions.) I have had my first vaccination and so has Graham. He does the school run. The Little Man is dropped off at the gate straight from the car and goes into the school guided by teachers. Other parents queue up to drop their children off and most follow social distancing rules.

Then there are those who see the return to school as the end of lock down. They chat in groups, go to each others house for coffee etc. Exactly as they would normally. If their kids are going to be together all day, why can’t the parents? I can see their point. However, for this return to school to work we have to follow the government guidelines and practice safety for a while longer. We need to keep the teachers safe, the children safe, and prevent the Covid virus from getting out of control again. Yes, a lot of the vulnerable are now vaccinated but it doesn’t mean that everyone is not at risk.

It’s all Relative

I am chronically ill. A day out is a rare occurrence for me. Graham popped to the post box and came in complaining that it was raining. He couldn’t understand how much I envied him. Ok, he thought I was nuts for wishing I could pop over the shops in the rain, but honestly, it would be amazing. It’s a normal situation that I just can’t do anymore, and I miss it. I miss chatting with friends at the school gates, watching my kids run around with others in the playground, popping to the shops with friends, visiting other’s houses, going out whenever I felt like it, driving my car, going out alone, walking, just walking, along the pavement.

Under lock down everyone else has missed these things to some extent too (maybe not the walking because unless you are in a wheelchair like me then you won’t understand that freedom.) I understand how hard it must be, but you will get that back soon. And the more careful you are right now, the sooner your freedom will come.

For people like me, the freedom will never be the same, but at least we will be able to actually go out again without the fear of getting so ill we will probably die.

Let’s See it Through to the End of Lock Down

I know some people still deny the pandemic, I know that some don’t want the vaccination or to wear masks or social distance. I can’t tell anyone what to do, but it seems like the government can’t either. If only we could all be on the same page and understand that we can see this through to end if we just follow a few rules. I don’t believe in forcing people to be vaccinated but for those who do want it, then go ahead, it will help stop the spread and the most vulnerable will be more protected. The sooner we get this under control the sooner we get our freedom back.

You will be able to continue with life as normal. And those of us at more risk will be able to get on with our previous kind of permanent lock down, knowing that we can escape occasionally without the added risk of catching a deadly virus.

We can’t bring back those that have died, and there are so many of them my heart breaks for all the families. What we can do is help prevent any more deaths. There is a light at the end of this very long and dark tunnel I’m sure, the end of lock down can be near.

tunnel with light at the end. Have patience, there is light at the end of the tunnel.

My Covid Diaries

Riding the Roller Coaster of the Last Ten Months

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Way back in March last year we got wind of a virus that was sweeping the world. Covid 19 they called it, believing it to have started in Wuhan, China and now becoming a pandemic. It seemed that Italy had it bad, but now it had reached the UK. At the time we had no idea of the roller coaster the next ten months would bring.

A quote from my first ever Covid post

A wise Dr from Toronto, Dr. Abdu Sharkawy, said ” Temper fear with reason, panic with patience and uncertainty with education.

These are the words I intend to live by over the coming weeks, or even months.

I think this is exactly what I have done. We have tried to stay safe but not in fear. We have not panicked but have been really patient, especially considering we have spent so little time out of our home. I am constantly educating myself on the virus and I listen to all sides not just what we are fed in the media. I’ve been down the big rabbit hole of the whole scamdemic and Covid hoax and I’ve made up my own mind. I’ve looked at the figures as reported on the relevant scientific sites, and seen that we have been through a sad and difficult time. So many people have suffered and not just from Covid. This virus has had a devastating effect.

In my first post the number of confirmed cases of Covid in my home city was 15, the current number of cases for the last week alone is 8,240 and the total so far is 75,983.

an image of the corona virus

Home School Round Two

The first lockdown began with a closure of the schools. My Little Man had lots of work set daily by his school and together we worked through it all. The girls had to work more independently but were not happy and did not fare so well. Still, it wasn’t going to be for long was it? Who’d have though it would have lasted until the Summer Holidays!

The school’s went back in September. I had my reservations, the virus hadn’t gone away and it seemed crazy having so many children all together in one place. The Little Man wanted to go back real bad and his school worked really hard on creating a safe environment. They did a great job and there was only one positive case in the whole school for the whole term up until Christmas. I can’t imagine what it would have been like for those children starting school for the first time like Mrs P’s little girl Dorothy.

The girls did not fare so well. Anxiety took a hold and after a couple of days they were refusing to return as none of the other children were following the rules. Boo was upset because she’d been separated from all her friends and hated the new changes where the teachers moved around rather than the children. The SEND department stepped in and offered the girls part time lessons in a safe environment. They were happier but they really didn’t get much work done. I tried to help compensate with extra work at home. Which worked better with Boo than Star.

Since Christmas we have been in a second school lockdown and the lessons have been on Microsoft Teams. All three children have to log on to their laptops and complete their lessons as if they were in school. The Little Man has taken to this really well and has not missed a lesson (even p.e.) but the girls are struggling more. Star is not happy at all and we are needing extra help from her SENDco. Boo, is doing slightly better but still gets a bit confused at times. It’s really not an ideal situation, but at least they are safe. Their school had several cases in every year, they even had cases in the girls years when they broke up for Christmas so if they had been at school they would have been advised to self isolate until Christmas Day.

Home school, blurred photo of someone writing while leaning over a desk

Ten Months of Shopping

I generally do my food shopping online anyway, but once the first lockdown was in swing, everybody wanted a slot and it was so difficult to get our food. I was already on the list as a vulnerable customer though and soon I was able to shop once a week at my usual supermarket online. It hasn’t always gone well but we haven’t starved yet.

I did get into a discussion about being privileged to be able to shop online. The cheaper shops like Aldi and Lidl don’t do online deliveries. Well, up until a few weeks ago we didn’t have an Aldi or Lidl nearby anyway. Some supermarkets do free deliveries and your shopping total can be as little as £25. Again someone said you were privileged to have £25 to spend..well, what’s wrong with a shop every fortnight then? I guess I felt a little defensive at being called privileged when I am disabled and vulnerable. I’d happily give up the option to shop online if I could walk and I was healthy. If being disabled is a privilege then it’s one I would not wish on anybody.

The Roller Coaster of the Last Ten Months

It certainly has been a strange time to live in. So many families have been torn apart, the hospitals have suffered, patients without Covid have suffered, babies have been born without fathers or birthing partners present. Many people have lost family members. Those that have survived have had to endure a long and painful recovery. Some are still recovering many months later and who knows how long some will be enduring the after effects.

On the bright side, many people all over the world have recovered well and we have a lot of vaccines that have been developed and distributed in record time. We are determined to beat this world destroying virus into submission.

People talk about the new normal which at the moment means, no gathering in other peoples homes, no hugging, keeping your distance from other people in all situations, wear a mask when out, no handshaking and lots of hand washing. There are also the extra restrictions during lockdown which means less shops open, no pubs or other public venues open, you can’t visit the gym or hairdressers for example. Life is very difficult for so many.

Hopefully, once the vaccination is rolled out enough and the amount of people admitted to hospital drops, we can slowly start venturing out into a more normal life. I do think that masks and social distancing will around for quite a while though. Plus we don’t know yet how long people will be protected with the vaccine, or how many will actually get it.

I have learned a lot about human nature. The movies show people turning on each other and turning pandemics into apocalyptic situations. I think we’ve come close at times, especially with the divide of people who are taking it seriously and those who just want to get on with life and take whatever happens. I thought we were going to go the way of the movies at one point, but the truth is, humans are much nicer than we sometimes give them credit for. There are way more sensible, caring, empathetic and just generally nice people out there than those who really don’t give a damn.

So, even if you are a person who thinks this is all a hoax, or that we are making far too big a deal of the whole situation. Or even that the huge death toll is not actually Covid related, just remember, there are thousands of people grieving loved ones. And show a little care to those suffering long term, debilitating effects after enduring an awful illness. A little kindness goes a long way.

For a very raw and honest story on what it’s like to catch Covid 19 Please read Tracey’s posts.

kindness begins with understanding we all struggle

All That She Wants is a Little Compassion.

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“Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive.” 
― Dalai Lama XIV, The Art of Happiness

I’ve mentioned it before but my Mum was very critical of me when I was growing up, she’d use phrases like ‘wet blanket’ and ‘so laid back, she’s horizontal.’ Yes, I know, she’d probably call me a ‘snowflake’ if she was still around.

But do you know what? I’m happy with the way I am. Yes, I may be over sensitive, I may think too much about stuff, I am a peace lover not a fighter. It’s taken me a long time to be comfortable with all that, but trying to change it has never worked.

Compassion

compassion/kəmˈpaʃ(ə)n noun

Sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others.

I think this world lacks a lot of compassion. I keep on getting drawn to threads on Social Media about the COVID pandemic and I know I shouldn’t. Sometimes I find it difficult to keep my mouth shout (or my typing fingers!) But, I don’t argue or lack compassion.

I got into a conversation with someone who stated that the virus was the work of nature, weeding out the elderly and sick to improve the human race. Like a Darwinian Survival of the Fittest. I should have avoided but I found his comments cruel. No-one deserves to die, particularly someone who has a young family and contracted a chronic illness which puts them at high risk. I told him his words were unkind and he just replied that he didn’t believe there was a pandemic anyway. Yes, I definitely should have avoided. I clicked his profile, he was a gay man. I remember back in the 80s when AIDs was rife and people would say it was nature’s way of weeding out gay people. I found that despicable too. I decided not to interact with this person anymore though. I guess some people just don’t think about their comments.

I hate that fellow humans cannot show simple compassion for each other.

All That She Wants is a Little Love in this World.

We CAN fight this pandemic together. We can work together and keep it under control while carrying on with our daily life. Yes, things will need to change for a while, less interaction, social distancing, mask wearing, no overcrowding. It’s hard, but it’s not as awful as losing a loved one, and it wouldn’t be forever. In fact it could all be over a lot quicker if people would show a little compassion for others.

There are two different kind of disaster movies, those were everyone does whatever they can to help their fellow humans, including self sacrifices. And those where everyone turns on each other and fights for their own needs with not concern for anyone else.

We are facing a global disaster, if it was a movie, I know which one I’d rather be acting in.

“For me, I am driven by two main philosophies: know more today about the world than I knew yesterday and lessen the suffering of others. You’d be surprised how far that gets you.” 
― Neil deGrasse Tyson

Compassion is Not So Hard To Feel

There is nothing wrong with caring about other people. Yes, you need to look after yourself too, but caring about others can make you feel even better.

We are all different, with different needs. I care that people can not go to work and see their friends and family. Despite the fact that I work from home and have all my close family around me at home.

I care that people are struggling to feed their families and losing their homes. I don’t want that to happen to anyone.

It even saddens me to see that those who have had fabulous weddings and holidays abroad this year cancelled. Despite the fact that I had no real plans apart from a couple of small British holidays (which were cancelled.)

My heart is broken for all those that missed hospital treatments and operations. For those that died of Cancer and other conditions that were diagnosed quickly enough.

Compassion means that I care about all these things and still believe that COVID is a big threat that should be taken seriously. I don’t think we’ve seen even half of the damage it is capable of yet. I don’t believe it’s less dangerous than flu and I think that people have become far too complacent.

So, why can’t people who are in these situations show a little compassion for those who have lost lives, who will lose lives and who have suffered greatly because of this virus. I keep getting quoted percentages which change from person to person, but percentages mean nothing to me. I care more about humanity and kindness. Plus, you can’t really evaluate percentages until the entire thing is over or under control. They mean nothing.

There is not point trying to make these people see my point of view. I don’t want to argue and fight. All that this woman wants is for us all to stand together and fight this pandemic into submission. And I believe it is possible. Plus a little compassion goes a long way.

Text on marbled background. This is my letter to the world, that never wrote to me. A quote by Emily Dickinson about compassion.

This is my post for Blogtober 2020 under the prompt ‘All That She Wants’ you can see my other blogtober posts here.

#Blogtober20

COVID Diaries Day 193 with some Good News

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It’s been a while since I wrote an update on our life since the outbreak of COVID so I thought I’d let you know how things are going right now, with a little good news too.

None of us have had COVID but I do know three people who have, one pretty badly. My eldest daughter is back working for the NHS in a local hospital. We are hoping it doesn’t get too bad again.

My Chronic Illness and some Good News

With the COVID pandemic my appointments with my consultant have been by telephone only. This has been fine and he even arranged my hospital treatment which went along well, although it was quite surreal being in a socially distanced and masked hospital.

a hospital infusion bag

Just before the lockdown in May I had an MRI which showed that my brain had been bleeding and I had a swollen part on my brain. I talked to my consultant and he said it was okay so long as it didn’t get any bigger. So he said I would need another MRI in 3 months to check there was no change. Because of the pandemic the MRI was actually nearly 7 months later and I did start to get rather anxious. Then I had the MRI and the results were really good. My brain is now behaving itself and there was nothing else to report. Phew!

It did make me think though. A lot of people have complained about appointments being delayed and people missing out on vital treatments and diagnosis, especially for cancer. (My anomaly was not cancerous.) I had to wait an extra 4 months for my scan and it was fine….but what if it wasn’t, what if it had grown and become dangerous, what if it had reached the point that treatment had become dangerous? It’s not good for me to think like that, but it does make me think of all the other people who have not had the good news I had.

The hospitals have had it difficult. People are constantly saying that there was never an issue, but I really don’t believe that they would deliberately delay treatments and appointments unless their hands were tied. It’s a really difficult situation and it’s not likely to get any better as we approach even more COVID hospital appointments. I just hope they have learnt a lot of lessons both in the hospitals and the government. Fingers crossed.

Back to School

The Little Man went back to school first but it was a hard decision. It didn’t help that on his first day back he ended up having a really nasty fall and spraining his wrist. He also caught a tummy bug which he kindly shared with us all just as the girls were going to go back! Then I had to spend a week in hospital for my treatment and the whole school situation became a nightmare. We decided to give up on the first week back and start again. The schools were understanding.

So, they all went back and afterwards the Little Man and Boo were happy but Star went to her bedroom and refused to talk to us. She then refused to go to school the next day. I chatted with the school and they said it was ok for her to do a gradual return of just a couple of hours a day to start with.

She went into school, spoke to a teacher and seemed okay. Then she got sick again. She’s still not been back. I’m not sure if her illness (Which I know is very real and physical) is down to anxiety. I am waiting for a call from our GP to try and get to the bottom of it (Bottom being the relative word here!)

The Future

For us, the future will be just taking precautions so that we don’t catch the virus. The Little Man is much happier being back at school, but I know that Boo is struggling (even though it’s hard to get her to open up about it.) And Star is struggling with her health and anxiety. I’m putting a lot of trust in the schools to keep them safe.

My daughter is back at work and Graham is the taxi driver of the house. She used to go to work on the bus but we don’t want to take that risk just yet. Especially as the numbers of COVID cases in our area are really growing at the moment.

My life hasn’t changed much. I don’t get out of the house very often anyway, usually it’s just hospital appointments. It feels kind of sad that summer is over without our summer holiday. We will make up for it next year I’m sure.

I’m still planning Christmas, it won’t be cancelled here. We generally only spend Christmas with our immediate family though. There are seven of us that live here so plenty of company. We do usually have a few relatives around to visit before Christmas but that will probably not happen this year.

So many months now we’ve had this virus hanging over us. We have to carry on with our lives, but we have to be careful too. We should take better care of our elderly population who have suffered so much. I can’t believe how much they have been let down. There is so much that could have been done better, but so much that needs to be done still to help us get back to normal. Some people refuse to accept a new normal, and many will reject a vaccination, but we all need to stand by our choices and make sure that whatever we choose we can always choose to be kind and think of others.

Or maybe I’m a dreamer?

(I’m not the only one!)

Imagine, text

Covid Diaries Day 161 – Freedom, a Month Later

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It’s been a whole month since I wrote a Covid Diary post. Some people think it’s all over because the death rates are going down. Some are marching for their freedom. Some people think it was all a government scam to keep us in control. Yeah, I have read up on this and I really don’t get it. Why would the government of almost every Country in the World make up a virus that kills people and destroys economies?

People have rebelled against having their basic human rights removed. It’s up to them what they where on their face, who they see, where they go and no-one can tell them otherwise. Especially not an invisible virus that only kills a minority of it’s victims. I’m not giving a figure because the figures are a mess, but thousands have families have been affected by this virus, and in my opinion, one family is too much.

Not Affected

A lot of people have been unaffected by this virus, they’ve been able to get on with their lives, continue almost normally, and they’ve not lost anyone or known anyone get sick. They are the lucky ones, but luck can run out.

The things that have been put in place to keep people safe are not for the lucky ones, they are to protect those that are less lucky, the vulnerable in the society, and those that put their lives at risk every day to help victims of this cruel virus. If you’ve not been affected that doesn’t mean that you can’t help others that have.

Freedom

image shows neon lights with the word Freedom.

People cry out for freedom, they refuse to be in lock down, they refuse to stop meeting up with family and friends and they refuse to wear masks. They do it all in the name of freedom, their rights to do what they want.

In the larger picture, a lot of people have survived the virus, they have recovered, some well, some not so good. But, it’s proof you can survive. Some have suffered at home without going to hospital and are now almost back to normal. But it’s becoming clearer that this virus can leave long lasting effects.

It’s true that it’s only a minority that end up in intensive care, and die. But a minority of millions of people is thousands. Take Wembley Stadium* full of people and kill them in one go. If there was something as simple as wearing a mask and social distancing that you could do to prevent that massacre, would you do it then? What if one of those people in that stadium was your Grandma? Would you give up a tiny bit of your freedom to save your grandma, or anyone else’s grandma? Do people really care so little?

Off My Soapbox

I have always been an empathetic type. I can’t help it, it’s built into my mindset, it hurts too much sometimes, but I’m glad I care. I talk a lot about my own issues, but in my mind I feel that my sharing is helping others to feel less alone in their issues. Maybe I’m wrong, I’ve often thought that. But, I can’t change who I am and how I feel.

I may even be a snowflake. I don’t care, call me what you will.

Anyway, now I’m off my soapbox I can let you know how the last month has been for us.

We’ve had two birthdays, Boo turned 13 and the Little Man turned 10. We had a little friend around on Boo’s birthday and the Little Man asked her back on his birthday. I also had a visit from a friend and her two boys. We were going to stay in the garden but it was one of those steaming hot summer days and ending up having to shelter from the sun.

We’ve had a couple of days out. One was at Cosford Airforce Museum which was really nice. We spent a lot of time outdoors, but inside we wore our masks and followed the one way system. They had staff on the doors with clickers to make sure that there were a safe amount of people in the buildings. It felt safe and it was a lovely day out.

The other day out we had was at Spencer’s Retreat. We were given a couple of hours on the farm by ourselves which was really nice. Of course this meant we had no contact with anyone else apart from the farm animals.

My eldest daughter went back to work, but she’s only part time at the moment and Graham is taking her and picking her up so she can avoid public transport.

Graham is still the only one going out, he goes to the shops, garage and has been to pick up take outs. He has also visited a friend and his Mum. I don’t have anyone to visit apart from my brother, and he has been to see me a couple of times instead. It’s easier as I have more space. We are being careful, but I think we have dropped our guard a lot too. I’ve noticed Graham doesn’t wash his hands every time he returns home like he used to.

The virus still scares me. I don’t want any of us to get it. I don’t want to go through any of it with any of my family. It’s not gone anywhere, it’s just being controlled. But if we don’t listen and do as we are told then I’m sure it could get out of control again very quickly.

How do you feel? Are you a freedom fighter? Do you think the pandemic is over?

*Wembley Stadium holds a total of 90,000 people and we are no where near that figure in the UK. I could have used a smaller stadium as an example, but this virus has not gone away and we could easily reach the number to fill Wembley if we don’t get it under control.

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