Each month I write about my Chronic Illness following the writing prompts from Sheryl at A Chronic Voice. I appreciate the chance to talk about my chronic illness as it part of who I am. This October the writing prompts are:
October Writing Prompts
I’ll be producing a lot this month. For starters, I’m taking part in Blogtober which means I’ll be producing, or attempting to produce, a blog post for every day of the month. I have taken part before and it’s such a lovely way to meet new bloggers and spend a lot more time writing.
I’m also producing a lot more with my crochet. I have three works in progress on the go and I have plans to start making Christmas gifts and decorations. I really wanted to make some pumpkin beanie hats which are so cute, but I don’t think I’ll have them ready in time for Halloween, so I’ll focus on Christmas instead.
I feel pretty confident I can do this, despite being back in hospital next week. My treatment seems to be working and I am feeling better than I have done in ages.
In Sheryl’s October writing prompt she talks about maybe acquiring new symptoms, but I feel the opposite. My last MRI came back clear so now I have less worry about what is going on in my brain. (Not my mind, that’s another matter!)
With my IVIG going ahead I feel that I am acquiring more strength and health. When I first went for IVIG treatment I thought it was going to be my miracle cure, and I was pretty devastated that it wasn’t. After about 18 months I decided to stop the treatment as I felt it wasn’t working. I went downhill pretty quickly, acquiring dozens of new symptoms and so much more pain. After talking with my consultant we agreed that the IVIG may not have been a cure but it was keeping me stable. I have a progressive condition so it’s bound to get worse, but the IVIG was delaying the progress. So now I’m back on it and already feeling better.
I find it hard to switch off. I don’t just mean digital devices, they are just a part of life. But, I find it hard to switch off from all the things going on in the world and in my home.
I watch the news and follow social media, I do research, I never take things at face value. I have to know everything, both sides of the story. But there is so much going on in the world it’s driving me crazy.
Then I have my family issues with two of my three youngsters refusing to go to school. I’m constantly talking to the school and working on ways of helping them. I feel like I never get the chance to switch off.
When I think of all the things I fit in to my day I wonder if I have any space at all to even breathe.
This is when switching off becomes vital. An early night, a movie, a good book, a moments meditation, peace and quiet. There are many ways to switch off and I try to practice them often. Otherwise I risk my brain exploding again!
When you have a chronic illness you feel like you don’t do much. Housework is practically impossible for me (apart from folding washing which takes up a lot of my time) as is shopping, the school run, cooking dinner all the usual things that a busy mum has to do. But, sometimes there are just not enough hours in the day to do the things I do. Plus I have to think about making money too, that means working from home. Physical work is not possible, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t do anything!
Well, if I wrote a list of all the things I’m currently disappointed with I’d be here all day.
I find the human race disappointing at the moment. We are in the middle of a pandemic and all we can do is argue about what is right and what is wrong. Why can’t we all just work together and beat this damn virus down.
The girl’s school has been both disappointing and helpful. Star has failed to attend, but they do keep trying new stuff and tomorrow she is going to try school again, in a classroom with one other child, both socially distanced and with masks, with a teacher with a shield. They will be there for two hours catch up lessons and not have to mix with any other children. It sounds extreme, but it’s what she needs. Her anxiety is through the roof.
Boo, is now having issues which are different to Stars but I am disappointed that they have not managed to keep their original promises and things have gone haywire. It all adds to my stress and causes conflict within the family too.
I will not disappoint my family and I’ll do my best to make everyone happier.
On a brighter note, The Little Man is doing brilliantly, he loves his school and his new teacher and is so much happier since he went back.
October is definitely the time of year when I form new groups and friendships, especially through Blogtober and This year I’m also joining in with 20 books for Christmas over on my other blog At Home A Lot.
I am also hoping to form new routines and habits. The world is changing and we need to change too. I have to try and get two of my family members to understand this and form new ways of getting them to survive these changes.
I’m also forming so many new ideas, for my personal life, my blog and my crafts and I’ll be excited to share a lot with my readers. Last week I created my very first crochet pattern which was really exciting, so I’ll be forming many more I’m sure (if life gives me the time.)
As Autumn is upon on and changes are happening everywhere, my objective in life is to form a new path, a new direction, a new outlook on life.
Thank you for reading, and thanks to Sheryl for writing these October writing prompts and creating the link up each month.