People often ask me why I’m so positive. Well, I do have my down moments, times when I feel I can’t cope anymore. But it’s my positive attitude that pulls me through, and it’s always there, deep inside, even when I feel depressed.
I’ve always been pretty laid back, I let life’s problems flow and deal with them when I can. Sometimes I procrastinate (okay, I procrastinate a lot) and this doesn’t help, but eventually I get everything sorted and back on track.
I always say that I had a good childhood, and I really believe it. But, how good could it have been really when my Dad died while I was young and mum had to bring up me and my brother in a time when one parent families were a distinct minority.
I always say that my first marriage was good, but it wasn’t really. despite the happy times and the births of my first two children, there was a lot of misery. When he finally left for good I didn’t cry, I’d done that too many times before when he’d left me. The last time I just felt relieved. We are still friends because I don’t hold grudges and he’s my kid’s Dad.
I don’t hold grudges you see. It’s not easy, but I forgive people that have hurt me and don’t dwell on it. I never used to, and it made me miserable. Forgiveness is like a magic potion for healing. I know some people find it hard and really can’t forgive those that hurt them. But you don’t even have to tell them you forgive them, just hold it in your heart, forgive them and the pain eases. You don’t have to worry or stress about them and what they’ve done, it’s over.
I don’t believe in karma. I think it holds you back, it’s kind of like revenge. If someone hurts you and you think that karma will get them, then it’s like saying you wish something bad to happen to them. Then there is good karma, where you think that those who have awful things happen to them will get their good things by karma. It just doesn’t happen and it’s not worth waiting for. I don’t believe in karma because I’ve seen too many bad things happen to good people and too many good things happen to bad people.
I never say ‘why me’ because it just makes you feel miserable. I know that bad things happen to people all the time, this time it’s my turn. Maybe I’ve had more than my fair share of bad things happen, but if I think why me, then I have to believe that I deserved them in some way.
So, why am I so positive despite everything. Well, I deal with my problems as they arrive, I may procrastinate but I do deal with everything eventually. I don’t dwell on the bad things that have happened and I don’t blame anyone, not even karma or myself. I forgive those that hurt me and don’t hold grudges. And I am determined not to let my old age be full of regrets or bad feelings, life is short and you have to make the most of the happy times and hold them close in your heart.
I would never look at a field of dandelions and think of them as a hundred weeds. For me they are wishes, little happy moments that are so much more special than the bad things.
How do you stay positive?