2010 – The Start of the Decade
The beginning of the decade seems like a lifetime ago, well, it actually is for my Little Man who was born in 2010. It was around this time that I announced that I was expecting a baby. A bit of a shock as he wasn’t planned and I thought my family was complete. Also, I felt a little old to be having another child, but it happened and I’m so glad it did. The Little Man was born in August 2010 on his due date by elective C-Section because he was feet first breech.
I started my family at the very beginning of 1988 with my first born son, then after three daughters, I finished my family with my second son.
The Next 5 Years
We found ourselves a family of seven living in a 3 bedroomed house. I had thought that maybe my older children would have moved out and started their own lives, but complications prevented that. We had a large bedroom which we were able to fit in a bunk and a toddler bed so we shared with the three youngest while the two eldest had their own rooms. We desperately needed a bigger house but at the time it seemed impossible.
My eldest son agreed to have his little brother in his room when he was a little older, and then we were going to split our large bedroom into two so the girls could share. It was still a tiny house for so many people though.
Then in 2013 we got the opportunity to move to a much bigger house. A new build with five bedrooms and three bathrooms. It was like my wishes had been granted. We moved in September and I hated moving; it was incredibly difficult to move from a house I’d lived in for 24 years of my life. Not only that, but I’m not someone who is not a frequent mover (see previous comment) and I had no idea just how much work was involved. Especially when I had three children under 7 to look after as well.
Also in 2013, Star woke up one morning with a twisted neck. There didn’t seem to be any reason for it, but she had complained of a sore throat the day before. We took her to A&E when she didn’t seem able to straighten it. We were sent home three times with the belief that it would get better itself, but her pain was bad and I couldn’t bear to see her suffer so much. So I took her back and finally she was scanned and admitted to hospital with a ‘rotary subluxation of the atlanto occipital joint.’ In total it took 18 months and five trips to theatre to fix her neck. Twice she was fitted with a halo brace for months at a time. She also came away with a diagnosis of a connective tissue disorder. We are still trying to find out exactly what is wrong with her.
By 2015, things were beginning to look up. Star had lost a year of school but by this time all three of them were in school and we were just settling into our new life of freedom. The only issue was that Graham’s Dad was very poorly and as the only driver in the family I had to take him to lots of hospital and Dr visits. At the very end of 2015 he passed away.
2016 and My New Life as a Disabled Person
On January 1st 2016 I woke up with pins and needles and by the end of the day I was hospitalised for two weeks. My illness had completely paralysed me and I had to learn to walk again. Sadly, I couldn’t walk unaided and even with aids, not very far. I was diagnosed with Transverse Myelitis and told I would recover in around 8 weeks.
A year later, January 2017 I was re-diagnosed with Stiff Person Syndrome + PERM and I realised I was never going to get better.
So the last few years of the decade I’ve been trying to come to terms with a disability that has left me in constant pain and having to use a wheelchair.
The End of the Decade
So, here we are in 2020 and it’s time to look forward. I am struggling but remaining hopeful that there will be some cure or treatment that works for me in the future. I feel about twenty years older than I am and the thought of living another twenty years like this is depressing, so I have to keep on hoping.
My children are all growing up, the Little Man is approaching his 10th birthday, and the girls will be 13 and 15 yrs old this year. Star will go into her very last year of school and I’m so proud of her for making it so far when it hasn’t been easy. I’m hoping that this year will give her a final diagnosis and we can work with that for the best possible future for her.
The Little Man is still in primary school until next year, I’m hoping that by the time he moves on to Secondary School he will have the help he will need to get through.
Boo is doing just great, she’s got some lovely friends and enjoying after school activities. She’s doing fine at school so I hope that continues.
There is still so much to look forward to, despite our health issues. By the end of this decade I will not have any school children and I guess I’ll be officially ‘old’ so I’ve got a lot to fit in before then. 🙂
Wishing you a Happy New year, I hope 2020 provides much needed answers and better health for you all x
Thank you Angela, Happy New Year x
Hi Anne, so much changed for you three years ago but I do admire your positivity! You always manage to share your story with no “woe is me”, which can’t be easy. Your post has made me reflect on the last decade, so much has gone on, things I had put to the back of my mind. Two weeks ago I turned fifty and next week my youngest turns twenty! Life is passing by, that’s for sure.
I always thought our house was cramped with four people in a two bedroomed house. I bet that sounds like luxury to you after having seven in a three bedroomed house?
Here’s to wishing you and your family a happy and healthy 2020.
Debs xx
Yes, it was great having a bedroom back for just me and Graham. And my lucky eldest daughter has a whole floor to herself with an en-suite bathroom. Happy New Year to you and your family too xx